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forgiveness

A Kernel of Respect

…can improve everything!


“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”
— 1 Corinthians 13:4-5

The current phrase of “Let’s Make America Great Again” has taken on a very different definition than what the words actually mean, depending on your viewpoint.  Today’s post is NOT a political blog.  It is one, I hope, of thoughtful deliberation.

People seem to measure life in a sequence of events: birth, childhood, adulthood, old age and death.  It is the connection of life events throughout these stages that define what we actually do to make our family, friends, neighbors, community, city or town, state, country and the world great – by our own individual actions.

An approach might be to view things from your own personal perspective and where you are in life and ask yourself “how can I make life great?”  You don’t need the word again – the fact that we breathe in and we breathe out already does that.

My method for myself, as a most flawed individual, is to do more than just breathe.  I’m a simple person and approach life with a simple outlook, primarily through these three things.

  1.  Demonstrate my faith.  Regardless of your choice of faith, or non-faith, this is not hard to do.  Respect. Kindness. It is simply helping others even when you don’t want too or don’t have time. Often this is made difficult because of the voices screaming to follow one path – their path.  While that may ultimately be the case, show respect for yourself.  Vetting it out will create an inner peace that will shine through your actions and help others return that respect.
  2. Stop and think.  Suspend any bias while you allow your mind to free flow without external noise.  What is the root of the issue? Why is it an issue?  Look at all sides.  Respect your own ability to reason, your own spirit to respect, and your own heart to love.  Find a point of collaboration – I promise you, this point exists. 
  3. That old expression, sometimes you have to go slow to go fast, is still true.  Rushing to action without going through steps 1 and 2, is fraught with heartache and can be damaging.  If I could have a do over for my rushing mistakes, knowing what I know now,  peace would be mine.  Peace doesn’t only come from regretting mistakes.  It comes from forgiveness.  When I learned to forgive, whether from someone asking for it or from my letting go of old hurts, I finally understood that I too could be forgiven.

In your hearts, set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.  — 1 Peter 3:15

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Changing Hearts is God’s Work

Forgiveness
Proverbs 22:3 says, “The prudent foresees evil and hides”.

How does a person forgive something that — to them — is unforgivable?

Jesus, while in agony on the cross said, “Father, forgive them for they do not know what they do.” (Luke 23:34).

Often in our humanness we wonder, “But what if they do know? What if their actions are calculated and self-serving?”  Distrust replaces love and forgiveness and when this happens, it’s time to be honest with God.  The best way to do this is by going to His word for direction.

Proverbs 22:3 says, “The prudent foresees evil and hides himself”.  But sometimes forgiveness requires caution because it is different from trust, necessitating the dynamics of a relationship to change.    Until an offender has a true change of heart, and because we can’t see that person’s heart, wisdom says to limit our trust in that person.

Trust is a like a four-way intersection where adherence to the wishes, viewpoints, or beliefs of others must intersect with humility and acceptance, even though they may not be the same as yours.  Pretense of respect and honor, shrouded in hollow words are as transparent as a full moon on a cloudless night.   For honor to shine true, the respect must be real.  How do we know if it’s real? We must proceed with caution given to us by the words of Jesus in Matthew 10:16, “be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves”. 

Forgiveness doesn’t mean acceptance, or even forgetting of transgressions. It requires truth which means letting go of that which has caused hurt, whether forgiveness was requested or not.  This becomes a decision of the will – a conscious choice made in the name of Christ – to forget as much as possible and to move on with your life. It doesn’t mean we’re not to forgive.  Forgiveness may influence our world, but we must be humble and grateful for God’s love and forgiveness of us as we forgive others while maintaining the recognition that we are not God.

Changing hearts is God’s work.

 

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Thanksgiving Day 2013 – Concepts of Choice

I choose to keep an adequate supply of “rose colored glasses” to wear during the darkest of times because they let sparkles of light shine through.

I choose to try to be happy because choosing to be sad, well, it just keeps me sad.

I choose to try to live according to God’s plan, even though I may not understand or agree with it; because understanding is not the same thing as knowing.  That comes from faith.

I choose to try to be a good mother, a good sister, a good friend, a good person even when I don’t want to be any of those things, because through God’s grace I have had the goodness of a mother, friends, and many other people who have blessed my life with their goodness.

I choose to try to have a glass half full of champagne, choosing to celebrate the good that comes with the bad.  Because how could we ever gain wisdom about what’s important in life, without acknowledging that the path that takes us to God has moments of joy to get us through moments of pain.

I choose to try to be faithful , even when the world is saying faith is a myth, because faith has always sustained me.

I choose to try to remember there is good in people, while choosing not to hold onto a perceived hurt, hoping others will forgive my hurts to them.

I choose to try to thank God throughout the day for my dog, Teddie, which means “gift from God”. So when I do, I’m actually thanking God for His providence.

I choose to try to donate time, money, products or services even when I’m experiencing tough times because I have received time, money, products and services to get me through tough times.

I choose to believe everyone will join me in choosing to be thankful this Thanksgiving Day, because I choose to try.

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