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Thanksgiving is all about the serving.

In the early 1990s,  I  served as the Director of Human Resources for the Georgia Department of Labor (GDOL), located in downtown Atlanta. What a great career move huh? Indeed it was! I was soon to learn a great deal about so many things during my tenure there, and it was to be a lot more than upward mobility.

First lesson: the state of Georgia was the largest employer in the state, with many, many levels of bureaucracy and complexities dependent on the mission of the respective agency.

Second lesson: the cornerstone for all the agencies operated under the basic tenet of serving the people. But the lifeblood of those agencies were the people.

Sound like a civics lesson? Please bear with me.

I worked side by side, long hours, low pay, but good benefits with some of the best people I have ever had the honor to know. Day by day, my respect  for these dedicated and caring government employees deepened. They are the “hidden heroes” behind that bureaucracy, held up by that cornerstone tenet, that makes our country work.

One such person, Debbie Landers, is dear to me, as well as to so many others whose lives she continues to touch.  Her health is not as good as it once was, but her heart and spirit are stronger than ever as she continues to serve at a homeless shelter in downtown Atlanta for over thirty years.  During this time,  her daughter and granddaughter have joined her.

She often shares her gratitude for the large and the small things in her life. I have her permission to share the following which she posted a few  years ago on Facebook.

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Debbie LandersDebbie’s Way of Serving

“Today I am so thankful that folks will go the extra mile to brighten the lives of strangers. Last night, at the shelter I personally observed so many acts of kindness between the volunteers and the guys. A group of volunteers came to share a meal with our guests and their companionship with them was heart-felt.

These volunteers came from a little church in Carrollton, Ga and they brought with them a feast. There was an abundance of food and the guys definitely got their stomach full. Over and over I kept hearing, “thank you for coming”, “thank you for dinner” and “thank you for all that you did to make this night special.”

Later, I was talking with one of the guys who told me that one year ago, he had lost his wife to cancer and at that point he just gave up on life in general. He totally lost everything he owned and became homeless.

As we were discussing Thanksgiving plans, he told me that a young man on a motorcycle had stopped him and his friend, and asked what they were doing on Thanksgiving Day. He then invited them both to his home for dinner. I wonder how many of us would have taken this step and invited a stranger into our home.

It turned out that the guy on the motorcycle works at one of the major trauma centers in Atlanta and a group from there were beginning a ministry to not only provide food, but an opportunity to move upward from their current situation.

Believe me when I tell you that there was love in the shelter last night.

So, my friends, as I think about the things I am most thankful for on this day, it is being able to see first-hand as folks offering a hand up, not a hand out, to some folks down on their luck and the rewards it brings.”

**********

Her words and her service touched my heart then and it still serves to remind me that in this confusing and chaotic world we live in today, it doesn’t take much to make it better…just a little help to our friends.

Debbie is a living legacy that I am blessed to call friend.  I am grateful to have her in my life in this season of giving Thanks.

Let’s all get busy serving!

 

“Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due,

when it is in your power to act.”

Proverbs: 3:27

 

A Do-Over Anyone?

 

Would of

Could of

Should of

…are mistakes. Have you ever found yourself writing any of these?”
Elizabeth O’Brian
http://www.english-grammer-revolution.com

Have you ever found yourself uttering those words of regret?

Would of you wanted a do-over, knowing what you know now? What could of been the difference it made?   Should of you regretted now what you didn’t know then?

I would of been a stay at home mom.

Would of my children been the better for it?

Would of I been the better for it?

I could of cherished the times spent on the front porch with my husband as we sat in our rocking chairs each evening,  sharing our day and watching the children play.

I could of left the dishes unwashed.

I could of not taken those times for granted.

I should of realized seconds, moments, days, weeks and years make up a lifetime.

I should of paid more attention to those times.

I should of thanked God for those blessings more than I did – I should of wanted Him to know.

As I ponder on the could ofs, would ofs, and should ofs I know this:   It is not too late to do it now.

would of could of should of

A Kernel of Radical Anger

via A Kernel of Radical Anger

What kids do when parents aren’t around…

The unexpected sparkle from this year’s Halloween. His parents must be so proud!

Every parent wonders what their kids will do when they are not around.  They will also ponder on what their children will grow up and be. I did.

I wanted them to grow up – not to be rich and famous (although that’s nice too) – but to just be decent people.

As parents we do the best we can, and pray for guidance. I did. Still do. I suspect my own parents did as well.

I remember, at the age of six, doubling over in laughter, as I ran from my brother Paul. He could never run as fast as I could, which I always found hil-la-rious; after all – he was older. Although the reason he was chasing me was no laughing matter. We had been doing what children of our generation would sometimes do, making mud pies down by the pond when he thought I should take a bite.

I didn’t want to and ran away. Fortunately Granny caught us and put a stop to those shenanigans!

Today, Paul’s health takes him in and out of hospitals and when things look the worst, he is that same generous kid, wanting to give me a bite of the pie that life offers and making me laugh.

My kids are all grown up now and they have become more than I knew to pray for.  How did that happen? God’s grace for sure as I look back and remember a few defining moments.

When my son was in second grade, he would come home from school complaining about Mathew, one of the kids in his class. Matthew suffered from ADHD and sometimes would forget to take his medicine. On those days he lost control and my son would come home, upset and confused about Matthew’s behavior. I told my son that sometimes people have problems that we don’t know about and it was best to just be kind.

Several months later we were on a class trip and I was one of the chaperones. I had just gone to work for the Georgia Department of Labor and one of the other mothers asked me if I was the new HR Director there.

The lady introduced herself as an employee there and I assumed that’s why she wanted to meet me. Nope, instead she said,  “When all the other kids won’t play with Matthew because he’s having a bad day, your son always does. I just wanted you to know and to say thank you.”

Mother to mother.

Her words were a humbling moment for this mom. After all the complaining that my son did about Matthew, he had indeed been kind to him.

My daughter developed a love for the DCFS foster program. Each Christmas, after my coworkers had selected tags for the foster kids from the giving tree, I would take all of the remaining tags. Then, as was our tradition, she and I would go shopping and she would select the gifts. Her happy smile and twinkling eyes shined with her love for kids that she didn’t even know.

Years later, it was her first Christmas away at college. She called me, weeping, to tell me about a little boy’s tag she had selected from the giving tree in her dorm. “Oh Mom – he wants a ball!”

“What’s wrong with that?” I asked.

“He only asked for a ball!” she said, the emphasis on the word a ball. “Not a football, not a baseball and not a soccer ball – just a ball…” She said, stopping as she gasped for breath.

“Which one did you get him?” I asked, hoping to calm her down.

She blew her nose in that disgusting way that you do after an ugly cry and said, “One of every kind.”

Another humbling moment for this mother.

It is those moments, when you are not looking, when you are not there, when your kids make their own decisions – those are the moments that highlight the people they will become, and proof of the people they already are.

Today, their love continues to be demonstrated when I’m not around, growing stronger in protecting and serving others.  Be sure to pay attention.

I would be honored if you would share humbling moments from your childhood or your kid’s childhood. These are the sparkles that give hope to our world.

“Train up a child in the way he should go; Even when he is old he will not depart from it.”              –Proverbs 22:6

 

A Kernel of Respect

via A Kernel of Respect

A Kernel of Respect

…can improve everything!


Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”
— 1 Corinthians 13:4-5

The current phrase of “Let’s Make America Great Again” has taken on a very different definition than what the words actually mean, depending on your viewpoint.  Today’s post is NOT a political blog.  It is one, I hope, of thoughtful deliberation.

People seem to measure life in a sequence of events: birth, childhood, adulthood, old age and death.  It is the connection of life events throughout these stages that define what we actually do to make our family, friends, neighbors, community, city or town, state, country and the world great – by our own individual actions.

An approach might be to view things from your own personal perspective and where you are in life and ask yourself “how can I make life great?”  You don’t need the word again – the fact that we breathe in and we breathe out already does that.

My method for myself, as a most flawed individual, is to do more than just breathe.  I’m a simple person and approach life with a simple outlook, primarily through these three things.

  1.  Demonstrate my faith.  Regardless of your choice of faith, or non-faith, this is not hard to do.  Respect. Kindness. It is simply helping others even when you don’t want too or don’t have time. Often this is made difficult because of the voices screaming to follow one path – their path.  While that may ultimately be the case, show respect for yourself.  Vetting it out will create an inner peace that will shine through your actions and help others return that respect.
  2. Stop and think.  Suspend any bias while you allow your mind to free flow without external noise.  What is the root of the issue? Why is it an issue?  Look at all sides.  Respect your own ability to reason, your own spirit to respect, and your own heart to love.  Find a point of collaboration – I promise you, this point exists. 
  3. That old expression, sometimes you have to go slow to go fast, is still true.  Rushing to action without going through steps 1 and 2, is fraught with heartache and can be damaging.  If I could have a do over for my rushing mistakes, knowing what I know now,  peace would be mine.  Peace doesn’t only come from regretting mistakes.  It comes from forgiveness.  When I learned to forgive, whether from someone asking for it or from my letting go of old hurts, I finally understood that I too could be forgiven.

In your hearts, set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.  — 1 Peter 3:15

A Kernel of Radical Anger

via A Kernel of Radical Anger

A Kernel of Radical Anger

 

I can get so mad when people don’t take care of those who can’t take care of themselves (like animals).   I don’t like to be mad.  It makes me feel bad, therefore, making me madder at what made me mad in the first place!

Recently a woman was standing in a line at the DMV in Missouri and fired her gun into the air because the line was too slow.  I don’t know if she calmed down after being thrown to the ground, handcuffed, and taken to jail.  My point is that this example, in its most basic form, is radical anger.

When a kernel of radical anger is planted, it grows from what it’s fed.  Today, political issues (groan) feeds this type of anger whether from public sources or in hidden back ‘rooms’.   Social media and different slants provided by different news agencies are often the triggers.

The good news from this is that our freedom allows us to choose our party of choice:  Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, Green and my favorite, Humane (animal rights).  There are more than 100 additional parties to choose from.  How good is that?

Sadly, the kernel of radical anger is growing in so many different directions that chaos is feeding radical anger. Humans have lost our ability to be both different and united. When did we stop thinking and deliberating on issues?  Recognition of differences, even if it’s not “your thing”, in and  of themselves should unite us; sadly, they do not.

So, do we risk an extreme reaction like the woman in the DMV line; or do we can choose a different method?

Why?

To find common ground for common causes, while respecting individual rights.

What?

By not feeding our kernel of anger and use:

      Truth over Lie.

     Kindness over rudeness

    Accepting your way is not my way – love diffuses hate.

Evidence of Success? 

Feed the kernels of honesty, respect and love as we remember what our country, and many other countries,  were founded on, which is (for purposes of today’s blog, my reference to county is America):

I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible with liberty and justice for all.”

John Dickinson, Founding Father in his pre-revolutionary song, “The Liberty Song” wrote, “Then join hand in hand, brave Americans all!  By uniting we stand, by dividing we fall.”

We the people created this county. Let’s not demolish it.

America must maintain the identity of what God blessed America with.  We welcome all in our big ole’ melting pot, sharing, working, learning, and trusting our personal savior.  Every individual brings something to the mix, not to dominate, but by doing the right thing in the right way. 

conflict-405744__340

 Proverbs 15:18 “A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.”

It’s just that simple.

A Kernel of Apathy…

…can grow anywhere at anytime, faster and denser than a patch of kudzu weed.  Where does it come from?  What nourishes it?  How do you recognize it?

                This week we celebrate the freedom of the United States of America.  How do we guard and protect that freedom from apathy?

                Well, can you cite at least one good thing our current president has done for our country? Here’s my example: he brought the remains of U.S. soldiers from the North Korean War home to American soil. My father was a veteran of that war, all defending our freedom. This was something to give thanks for as it brought closure and honor to so many.

                Do you know who your state government officials in Washington are?

                Do you know who your local government officials are?

                Do you know that these officials ran for public office to serve? Therefore, you can and should contact them when you have questions, concerns and suggestions.

                If you couldn’t answer even ONE of these questions I ask you to consider this – when did that kernel of apathy get planted in your heart and soul?  Has it been there so long you fail to recognize it for what it is?

                On this July 4, 2019, let us never forget the powerful words that not only declared America as a free nation, but also what it means to be free:

                “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights that among these are Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness.”              

——U.S. Declaration of Independence July 4, 1776

                God, our Creator, gave us this freedom along with His Holy guidance to secure and honor that freedom.  Let us be thankful and never forget that…              

                God Blessed America.


photo cc Linda Breeden

  “And the Lord is the Spirit: and where the spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.” 

2 Cor. 3:17

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